Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I have feelings that need drinking.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
