No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
