I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize