you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
