Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Randomize
