He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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