I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
