i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize