first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
