I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
