Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize