You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
