just tell him i said nine months
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
