She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i wish my penis had a tongue
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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