I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
