Yo dont text me then not text me
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
