I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
