remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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