we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
