I bet he comes in French.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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