I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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