ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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