how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
