Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
