Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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