Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
