How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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