It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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