dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
