I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
