the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
