Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
