i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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