This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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