stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
