Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
