I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
