I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
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