forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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