I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
