You're completely useless in the revolution.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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