i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
