just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
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