the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
