i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
FUCK WHALES
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