omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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