ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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