chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
this beer tastes like vomit already
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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