New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
