Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
