I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
